A Poem for Skyler

A Poem for Skyler

[ March/April 2001 ]

A Poem for Skyler

by Frances Marin-Polak

I want to write something beautiful,
to create something in the void that has become my life.
My mind feels heavy, full of wasted thoughts that have not been expressed.

I want to feel the earth between my fingers,
to give shape and texture to this formless ball of clay.
My hands have become soft, uncalloused and clumsy from idleness.

I want to sing a powerful song,
to give voice to the withering spirit inside me.
My throat needs to be cleared as if I've just awoken from a long sleep.

I want to dance to a tribal rhythm,
To breathe heavy and feel my feet pound the living earth.
My legs are weak from disuse and may not carry me through the journey ahead.

I want to paint in neon and rainbow colors,
to bring warmth and passion to a jaded world gone gray.
My eyes grow weary from watching tragedy and violence everyday.

I want to raise the child inside of me,
to know the woman I used to be in my youth.
My child must not meet a woman chained by her fears and defeated by conformity.

I want to create a new world,
to bring my child into an enlightened reality of peace and wisdom.
My thoughts, my hands, my voice and my strength must make it so.

This poem was written during my 9th month of pregnancy, when I was freaked out over what type of mother I would be. There were so many things I wished for my daughter to become! I felt the best way for her to become strong, powerful, wise, creative and playful was to have those traits myself -- traits I was afraid I was losing by falling into the traditional role of wife and mother, getting caught up in the day to day minutiae. The poem was a cry to my inner child, to come forth and help me in raising my daughter.

Frances Marin-Polak is a financial consultant and the new ad sales representative for Alaska Wellness. She writes in her spare time and is currently working on a novel.