Continually running old mental tapes through our minds - loop after loop of messages that run our behavior - can be a problem. For one friend, just hearing a deep authoritative voice could trigger her into a rage reaction. When someone failed to respond to one of my clients in a direct or timely manner, she would lapse into an inner feeling of being cut off and rejected, and become despondent for hours.

Another word for these processes is trance. In these moments, our focus of attention is somewhere inside so deep that we don't notice what is going on around us. Unconscious mind activity overtakes conscious alertness. We all move in and out of trances many times a day. Trances can be negative (ranging from severe addiction, self-destruction and limiting behaviors) or positive experiences (including joy and pleasure).

Isn't it startling how many voices we listen to are not really ours and that we actually don't want to follow? If our intent is to wake up and live more consciously, we must decide whether the unconscious internal dialogues are influencing us or whether we choose to influence them.

Here's how to use the same trigger process that puts us into a trance, but instead of letting it move us where we don't want to go, putting ourselves into a more resourceful experience that allows us to express more of who we truly are.

My friend's newly created voice was a rumbling "you are in trance," which made her relax before the old rage could appear. My client attached a melodic female voice to her previous trigger, saying, "You are connected. You're fine." There are no limits to these messages. They can even be nonsense syllables.

Creating your own voice is just like working out at the gym; it takes time and practice. New neuro-pathways need building. Be patient and ask for assistance.