If you are not living that kind of a life today, it is probably because at some point you came to believe that giving up on your dream was part of growing up, becoming “adult” and responsible. You did what you felt you had to do. Maybe you are living a more or less successful life – and that’s fantastic. The question is not whether you need a coach, but whether you are prepared to benefit from coaching. I believe that anyone who is ready for it can realize almost unimaginable benefits from partnering with a life coach: to recapture (or discover!) your dream, eradicate limitations and facilitate what you want to happen with less effort, less time, and greater effectiveness than going it alone.

A sports analogy is often helpful – you use a life coach the way you would use a sports coach. If you wanted to learn to play golf, you could buy a set of clubs, read books or watch videos, and practice on your own. Depending on your motivation, you could probably achieve a more or less satisfying level of proficiency. However, if you want to dramatically flatten the learning curve or raise your game to a higher level of play, you’d hire a coach. The coach would observe your playing style and level of performance, discuss goals for what you want to work on, and then work with you to achieve those goals. A life coach does the same for your life.

Today there are coaches specializing in almost any conceivable life situation you could face. There are money management coaches, relationship coaches, recovery coaches, parenting coaches and spirituality coaches. Are you looking for a new job, your first job, or advancement within your current job? Are you considering a mid-life change in career or life direction? Corporate managers and executives have found that coaching is an effective tool in learning to lead their own employees to higher levels of effectiveness, individually and on project teams. Professionals report that their coaches have helped them to develop self-sustaining practices where the necessary business chores no longer distract them from the performance of their profession. Through coaching, they come to realize their humanity encompasses far more than simply their professional identity.

Goal setting and achievement are fine as far as they go, and any good coach should be willing to work with whatever a client brings to the table. People set good goals all of the time – especially on New Year’s! The goals themselves aren’t necessarily bad, but too often we’ve come to believe that, "If only I could have this one thing, then I'd be happy" – the right job, the right mate, a competent and cooperative staff, the right bank account balance, or wardrobe. Others say, "If only I could reduce my possessions by half, lose 10 pounds, achieve simplicity, get centered, I'd find happiness.” We think that adding or removing just that one thing or the other will make our lives ideal. Good coaching opens up the awareness that there are foundational, structural changes or realignments needed to effectively transform our lives.

Too often, for too many, this understanding comes too late if at all. Different spiritual traditions throughout the ages have expressed the paradoxical teaching that it is by the honest acceptance and contemplation of our mortality and inevitable death that we can begin to live most fully now. Almost inevitably, people who survive life-threatening illnesses or accidents come away with a more profound appreciation for life. They may appear to be both more “serious” and sober-minded, yet at the same time “lighter,” more joyful, less bogged down in what are now understood to be non-essentials. Trivialities, contradictions, and compromises with their values and integrity are gone. Life is lived with an intensity and vibrancy previously unknown. Many combat veterans say they still remember the smell of the coffee and the taste of the meal they ate on the eve of a major battle, even after 50 years.

How unfortunate that it usually takes such dire experiences to produce such positive changes! Beliefs vary as to what happens after the end of this life, but no matter whether you believe that we have souls that continue on additional cycles of existence, that this is a one-time passage with an eternal destination afterwards, or that simple oblivion awaits, this life is our one time through this time.